Agony

He smiled in his sleep. Riding- it had been at least a decade since he had sat a horse, but in this dream, he was RIDING. The horse he was mounted on was huge. Dapple gray, with an incredible long, flowing mane, Sean Cullen was once again on a horse. The simple act of sitting on a horse- never mind a horse like this- brought about a joy that Sean had not felt in far too long. He sat up tall on the broad back, and lifted his smiling face to the Heavens. Soon, he felt the horse begin to walk, and the gentle rocking motion brought back so many memories. He and his beloved, beautiful Katherine used to ride together all the time. She thought nothing of issuing a dare, and racing off ahead of him, turning back to smile a wicked grin and let out a laugh, shouting at him, "Keep up, Sean! Keep up!"

So many rides together. Lives tightly interwoven with horses. When he lost her, the love of his life, he lost all desire to ride or to even look at horses. Age was shaking him now, and he knew- deep down he knew- that he did not have much longer left on this Earth.

He relaxed, and grabbed a handful of mane. Looking down at the ears of the big gray, he saw they were moving around the farm. Shadows of horses here and there, laughter ringing out from Keeley and Katherine, fleeting glimpses of the past. A black horse stood watching, off in the distance. Sean dipped his head to her, feeling a chill run down his spine. The big gray shook his head and pinned his ears, almost as if he was warning the black horse to keep it's distance.

As Sean looked, he saw Legacy's paddock. Standing under the giant live oak tree, with the sunlight peeping down through the leaves stood his beautiful Katherine. The sunlight danced across her smiling face, showing her laughing eyes. The big gray danced his way to the paddock. Sean felt as if they were dancing on air. They moved their way to Katherine, and Sean slid down off the horse. He reached out to her, wanting to wrap her in his arms, to hear her laughter, see her smile, and feel her heartbeat, hear her breathing. His heart ached with missing her. Stretching out his arms, a tremor in his hands, he reached for happiness. "Katherine... Katherine.." he crooned softly to her. She danced just out of his reach, so close and yet so incredibly far away. "How much longer must I go on with out you Katherine? Life has no meaning any more."

Katherine smiled at him. "Not yet, Sean. You've a job to do. Soon though- soon we will be able to be together. But know in your heart I am always with you, never far away. But for now, I ask of you- watch Legacy and Keeley. Help her Sean. Help him."




Sean woke with a start, shaken from the dream. She had been so real, so close. The pain from her death had never lessened, he had only learned to live with it. His soul was stuck in one space of time- one heartbeat over and over again. As he remembered the dream, he heard her message once again, as if she was whispering in his ear- "Help Keeley, Sean. Help Legacy. They both need you."